Fee Fie Fo Figga...

…Boy, I hate a nigga.

DISCLAIMER: For those of you who are upset with the usage of “nigger,” “nigga,” and anyother derivative of the “n-bomb” please stop reading now, this isn’t really one of my posts for commentary or to foster discussion, it’s more of a rant. While your feedback is always appreciated, this is just to let me get this off my chest.

Earlier today I was in the barbershop with my father and was just listening to standard barbershop dialect and then the awesome feat that is niggardry arose out of the conversation. I know there are many definitions of the word “nigga,” but for the purposes of this posting we’ll just go with a lazy and shiftless negro. Well the first piece of the conversation that bothered me arose out of discussions on the BP settlement. One of the customers in the shop was talking about his attempts to become a plaintiff in the legal matters with BP but the frustration that he was having because of the requirements. His first point was why should this law firm require him to provide proof of income? He then compounded that point with stating that his income fluctuates so why should his income of last year be measured as his loss point. I just shook my head and chuckled inside. After Katrina, niggas fell under the belief that the government and these multi-million dollar corporations just have money to give out for nothing. First of all, I’m under the belief that unless your profession is actually in the gulf (i.e. fishermen), or you operate a hotel, resort, or something that is directly in the tourism industry, you didn’t really suffer a loss. Like, I’ll be the first to blow the “bullshit whistle” when it comes down to people trying to get over, on anyone, so with that being said, how can you justify your rental property as being tourism related when the minimum lease you’ll allow someone to sign is 3 months? Secondly, if these people are giving you money, don’t you think you should have to justify this to them and what other way than by your income? And because your income fluctuates nothing says that absent the Deep Water Horizon explosion, you would make more money, you could actually make less. Please, miss me with all that…

The second thing that pissed me off was a discussion about child support and how ALL (not many, but as the barber said “all them heauxs”) women manipulate the system for child support and its all a plan designed to “keep the black man down.” (the #1 nigga catch phrase) How can you say this as a man, and even moreso as a father. Now in some instances, I will admit that child support of such an astronomical amount is not needed, but its kind of like a double edged sword because I see the point of the law, YOUR children are YOUR responsibility, and if you were still with the mother, the child would probably get much more than 20% of your check. Which shows the ignorance of that statement, I know of a few mothers who have shot themselves in the foot by putting their child’s father on child support out of spite, and now they get only what the court requires be given unless it’s a holiday, birthday, or the beginning of school. But then again, niggas don’t read or learn so they probably wouldn’t know that. Miss me with that too…\

Finally, the last commentary that the niggardry arose on was Obama. These jackasses said that Obama aint doing his job because he’s not catering to Black America. Well, hello?! I said for the longest how white people should be happy that Obama is the president because he is half white, and half African, two groups that stereotypically don’t like blacks. Also, keep in mind that Black Americans no longer make up the majority minority in the nation so catering to Black America wont get you reelected, that’s for damn sure. To compare Obama with Bush is totally redundant because Bush is white and his daddy was President. I just cant fathom how niggas come up with the kind of shit that comes out of their mouth. Chris Rock said it best; “fee fi fo figga…boy I hate a nigga.”